i buried a sword my f*ther made in my back yard YEARS ago and i live on a large plot of land and i can’t for the fucking life of me remember where, is anyone out here psychic enough to point me in the right direction, i’m getting exhausted and can only dig so many fucking holes in a day. yes i’m being serious, i want the fucking sword back
can’t use a metal detector bc junk land + lockdowns so i’m just going to dig holes all weekend until my momther starts screaming
only 46 more plots to dig
i was rly unclear so, yellow is places where there’s structures or whatever so it’s not possible for it to be there. red x is where i’ve already been :(
not pictured; mother yelling at me thru the window to fill in and re-seed the holes i’m making
i was going to take a break bc it’s hot and i’ve been playing manual-labour-battleship for going on 3 hours now, but someone just told me “there’s better lies to make up for notes xoxo” so now i ha—i Have to find this sword to deliver it personally up their ass
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA LADS WE’RE IN 34 COULD THIS BE IT AAAAAAAAAAAAA
Please imagine some warrior culture (e.g. Klingons) getting super into video game esports in a relatively war-less setting and just getting insane about it
Like everyone at first thinks “haha, they probably don’t understand video games because they’re a bunch of bloodthirsty brutes” and it’s a fuckin Space Orc Sweep at the Space Esports Tournament. Orc Devin, a scrawny nerd of an orc, gets absolutely HOISTED by his yoked-to-the-nines parents who are just so proud that their weakest son is their most victorious warrior. His fighting is done with more finesse, battling with his hands, mind, and eyes instead of RIPPLING BICEPS and POWERFUL GUTS and BARREL-CRUSHING THIGHS, but he battles nonetheless. His space hometown honors him with his own sword and a plaque. They rent out a space billboard bragging about how Orc Devin kicked everyone’s asses and was the Most Badass Motherfucker in this cool new digital warfare they are now starting to get probably too-into as a culture.
WHERE NATURE DID NOT FAVOUR HIM AT BIRTH, HE SOUGHT OUT BATTLE NONETHELESS.
CRUSHING NOT THE BODIES OF HIS OPPONENTS, BUT THEIR VERY MINDS AND SPIRITS.
LIMITED NOT BY THE REACH OF A SWORD, HIS CONQUESTS AND VICTORIES SPAN THE UNIVERSE.
was in the car with my friend when I saw the car we passed had the license plate “SADNESS” and I went oh wait we gotta slow down so I can get a pic, but every time we went slower the other car also slowed down. so I looked behind us to see what was going on and the passenger also had their phone up and wheezing the same way I was, and that’s when I remembered my friend’s license plate is “LOSSJPG”
you think I would do that? just go on the internet and tell lies?
